Surfer Jokes

Surfing is one of the few sports where you can pee whenever you want. That's why they call them wetsuits.

Q: How do you get a surfer to school on time?
A: Tell him the waves are crappy.

Q: What's the difference between a surfer and a large pizza?
A: A large pizza can feed a family of five.

Q: Why is surfing like sex?
A: When it's good, it's really, really good. And when it's bad... it's still pretty good.

Q: Why are surfers generally more cheerful and relaxed than most others?
A: They are the only grown-ups who get to pee in their clothes on a regular basis.

Q: What do you call a surfer who just broke up with his girlfriend?
A: Homeless.

Q: Why did the shortboarder cross the road?
A: Because all the other carbon-copied, brand-wearing, sticker-flashing unimaginative shortboarders did.

Q: What detergent do surfers use to wash their wetsuit?
A: Tide!

Two surfers are getting ready to paddle out.
Surfer one: "Hey, guess what! I got a new longboard for my wife!" Surfer two: "Great trade!"

The boy asks, "Daddy, what makes the wind blow?"
Father says, "It's caused when daddy puts on his wetsuit".

A surfer known for the amount of waves he caught was asked for his secret.
"It's simple," he replied. "When I get up in the morning, and my wife is lying on her right side, I only take waves with a right break. If she is lying on her left side, I only take waves with a left break."
"Suppose she is lying on her back?"
"In that case, I sure as hell don't go surfing!"